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Massage can take on a whole new twist when it’s done with someone you’re in a sexual relationship with. Massage helps us break down walls and boundaries, destress, and melt into bodily sensations. It allows us to practice the art of giving and receiving – and can be some of the hottest foreplay out there!
Want to give (or receive) an XXX massage? We’ve got all the tips you need!
You want your partner to be as relaxed as possible before you dive into the juicy parts, so make sure to set the vibe of your space. First, warm up your space. Cold and sexy don’t mix for a number of reasons – it’s unpleasant, it blocks the ability of the receiver to concentrate on the massage, and it diverts blood from the important areas of the body.
Pro-tip: use an electric blanket/pad to put underneath your partner, that will help keep them toasty as things heat up.
Candles are always a great touch when setting the vibe. Candles can take on a whole new twist by using our Full Body Massage Candle (and yes we mean FULL body) or our Flickering Touch Massage Candle.
When grabbing a massage oil, make sure it’s downstairs-friendly, keeping in mind that the vulva can be extra sensitive to certain ingredients and scents. Make sure to use oils that are natural, skin-safe, and preferably scent-free.
Virgin olive, coconut, almond, and cold-pressed sunflower or canola are appropriate massage oils. If you do want to use essential oils, be sure to do an allergy test on your partner’s lower arm before the actual application, or just throw them in a diffuser to prevent any skin mishaps.
Remember that a sex massage should feel different than getting a deep tissue or sports massage. The pressure you use should be enough to get them in the mood versus the type used to get knots out of one’s back. Soft and sensual is sexy.
Depending on what you’re into, subtle is usually better than physically intense when it comes to sex massages. The real intensity comes from taking your time and being present, not digging into their muscles as deeply as humanly possible.
Remember to always treat your partner’s body as a whole. Start on either side of the body and make sure to cover the body head to toe before moving your attention to their erogenous zones. You can lightly brush them there with a light touch but don’t linger there (yet).
Rhythm is your friend. It allows you to smoothly change gears while switching back and forth between high-charged areas and lower-intensity ones. You can put on some chill, relaxing music. It will remind you to keep your moves at a nice consistent pace. Apart from rhythmic, you also want your strokes to be circular and continuous to feel as natural as possible.
As you explore your partner’s body, make sure to observe subtle reactions to touch. Notice changes in their breathing patterns and things like trembling in the abdominal area, which is a good indicator that they’re probably getting turned on.
A twitching movement can suggest both pleasant and unpleasant sensations, so when you notice one, communicate it with your partner. You can do this in a way that feels hot, unlike a normal massage therapist would do. Questions like “Do you like that?” and “How does that feel?” are simple and sexy.
While someone may want to zone out during a normal massage, during a sex massage you’ll want to keep communicating with your partner to make sure they’re actually enjoying the experience and you’re able to attune to their needs. Still, you’ll want to communicate in a way that doesn’t require answers more complex than “yes/no” or “mmhmm”.
It’s hot to let them know that you like what you see and are getting turned on being able to see and touch their oiled-up body. You can do this by saying things like “You’re so hard”, “You’re so wet”, or “Your nipples are so hot when they get hard like this”.
You can even make a roadmap of pleasure on their body. Once you cover all of it, take a mental note of which areas triggered the most arousal (aside from the obvious). Slowly start giving those areas more and more attention. Then, as you progress, you can massage and caress those zones and go from there to their vulva/penis and back.
Learn how to use your hands well – using palms for broad pressure and fingers for a more focused and playful touch. You can also use the rest of your body! Get creative with our lower arms, legs, feet, breasts, ass, and, especially, your genitals. Lubed-up penises and vulvas can be so hot to use up against your partner’s body in fun and novel ways (use your imagination).
Here’s what using continuous movement looks like in practice:
If your partner has a vulva, have her lie on her back (you being next to and over her). Start by gliding your whole palm over your partner’s pubic area with gentle pressure and, in the same movement, slip your fingers under them following and exploring the curve of their ass.
Cover the area around the clitoris with your lower arm and grind it with constant pressure while bringing your hand back. In further continuation of the movement, you may slide your palm over their vulva and gently spread their labia with your index and ring fingers, possibly even slipping your middle finger inside if you’re feeling frisky.
If your partner has a penis, again have them lie on your back with you kneeling between his legs. Start by moving your palms up his thighs, applying strong pressure, and then, as you get closer to his penis, reduce the pressure to very mild and glide your fingers and palms over and around his balls, grabbing his penis with both hands.
While you increase the pressure, you can do a couple of both-hand strokes and even bend over him, starting to use your mouth – all in a continuous flow of movement. Spicy!
There you have it! Your guide to a sexy XXX massage. Remember that there’s no specific goal or thing you need to achieve (like an orgasm). You’re simply there to connect with your partner, get to know each other’s bodies better, and give and receive pleasure.
SONA 2
ENIGMA
F1S V2
HUGO 2
GIGI 3
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